The Allure of the Bottom 10

Originally Published: November 22, 2004

Weeks: Preseason | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13

The Bottom 10's first inspirational thought of the week:

I'm gonna knock you out (HUUUH!!!)
Mama said knock you out (HUUUH!!!)

-- LL Cool J, "Mama Said Knock You Out"

The Bottom 10's second inspirational thought of the week:

Mama said
Don't cry
Dry all the tears
From your eyes
Don't be afraid
Be strong
Just keep on holding on

-- Allure, "Mama Said"

A bit of a mixed message from this week's inspirational thoughts, huh? There's a reason. Considering what went down at the South Carolina-Clemson game, fighting just had to be mentioned. And when you fight, there's usually a penalty to be paid. The penalty for the Gamecocks and Tigers is the coveted No. 5 spot.

Now let's see, who else has been in the news lately and knows something about fights and penalties? How about NBA fan-favorite Ron Artest? In case you missed it, Mr. Artest was suspended for the rest of the NBA regular season for his role in the Pacers-Pistons brawl. As the Bottom 10 recalls, Artest wanted some time off to promote his girl group's new album anyway. In honor of Artest's Tru Warier label releasing Allure's "Chapter III" on Nov. 23, the penalty for being in (and reading) this week's Bottom 10 is, well, Allure.

The Bottom 10 travels to the Magnolia State to catch the annual Egg Bowl for the Pillow Fight Week, where fans of Ole Miss (3-7) and Mississippi State (3-7) will be giving thanks that the season is finally over.

With apologies to Steve Harvey, here's this week's Bottom 10:'s Bottom 10
 RankTeam2004 Rec.Comment
1.Central Florida0-10"Uh Oh" If the Golden Knights lose the season finale on Tuesday, they will be Division I-A's only winless team in 2004.
2.Western Michigan1-10"Hate 2 Luv U" This is especially true since the Broncos' terrible season broke up that whole Directional Michigan thing we had going.
3.Washington1-10"Frustration" This season's been such a disaster for the Huskies that they couldn't even beat their usual whipping boys Washington State.
4.Ball State2-9"I Watch Ya" Seeing the Cardinals lose to Central Michigan was enough to move them all the way to No. 4.
5.Clemson-South Carolina fight0-2"Sitting At Home" The Tigers and Gamecocks announced Monday that they will decline any bowl bids as punishment for Saturday's embarrassing brawl.
6.Buffalo2-9"Without You" The Bottom 10 just wouldn't be the Bottom 10 without an appearance by the hapless Bulls.
7.East Carolina2-8"I Feel So" Not only did the Pirates lose another game, but coach John Thompson also resigned last Wednesday.
8.San Jose State2-8"Relax And Unwind" The Spartans deserve a break after falling to Tulsa, who was No. 4 in last week's Bottom 10.
9.Duke2-9"Bitter Sweet" The Blue Devils surrendered the Victory Bell to UNC, but earned a place in the Bottom 10.
10.Illiana6-16"I Think I'm In Love" In the grand tradition of U-L-U-Pick 'em and Directional Michigan, Illinois and Indiana join forces to make the list.
10.UNLV2-9"Stay" The Rebels remain in the rankings, but John Robinson is leaving Las Vegas.

Waiting list: Arizona (2-8), Army (2-7), Baylor (3-8), Idaho (3-9), Kentucky (2-8), Rice (3-7), SMU (3-8), Temple (2-9) and Vanderbilt (2-9).